Two arrests for the same offense in one day. One person altered his inspection sticker and the other simply took one off a truck and put it on his car. I did that when working the hood. I mean arresting two people for that same offense in the same day!

I run a plate and see the registration expired last year. He pulls into a parking lot. I look down and notice a word buried in my readout "stolen!"
Uh oh! How did I miss that the first time? I get the driver (a 60 year old man) back in his car. I finish the return but nowhere else does it say stolen. I figured the car had been previously stolen and then recovered. Funny thing is nobody checked by. Good thing I was under control the whole time.

A young man hits a car and keeps going. Sadly for him the other driver got his plate. His car was found in the parking lot of a nearby college. The officer waited on the driver who showed up and presented an altered alien card. The illegal alien said he didn't have time to stop! What nerve!

A thief was being watched on camera stealing clothes. The store initially called the police. The thief went into the bathroom. Per store policy they can no longer stop the thief because they lost sight of him and don't know if he has the merchandise on him anymore so they call back to cancel the call. About 30 minutes later they call back to report they chased him in the parking lot where got into his car and fled after striking two parked cars!

A man gets stopped by an officer on his way to pick up his kid from school. Maybe it was ego, or sexism, or just stupidity he tells the officer he has no time for her and tries to leave. He gets arrested in front of his kid. What a damn fool!

I was working an extra job at a school and walking through the parking lot. I then hear a kid saying hi. I look around and find a little boy in a car by himself! "Oh hell no!" It's not hot and the window is down and he's been there for about 5 minutes because I saw the car pull into the parking lot. I learn that he's 8 and his mom is inside the school. The mom and a her boss (a teacher at the school) come out and the mom has been bawling. They tell me her son got thrown out of school for the day. The story they tell me is that he brought a ruler to school and hit another kid who grabbed him in a bear hug. Apparently at this particular school one cannot bring a ruler! Excuse me isn't a ruler a school supply? Talk about getting stupid! Really! Why stop there may as well ban pens and pencils since those can be used as shanks!


A gang member was caught trying to break into a car but he set off the alarm. He jumps in his car and drives off and is caught by responding units. A weapon is found in his trunk and he is arrested. Funny, the intake DA takes the charge and the gang member is taken to jail. Hours later another DA rejects the charge because the weapon was in the trunk and not "on or about the person." To be fair the statute does read that way. The legislature really needs to address that issue. Crooks can easily avoid arrest with this handy little knowledge.


Today was a day I really didn't feel like doing much. Maybe because I was mostly tired. There are days when I feel like kicking ass and taking names. There are other days when I don't want to do a damn thing! At the end of the shift I was with two other officers who have been around 10 years like myself. The topic came up how we all got started out. Both of their stories were pretty much the same as mine. They were called into the office by the recruiter and rushed through the hiring process. With me it was the same. I had a job at a local store and had to be at work right after the interview. He then scheduled me for the polygraph right then. It made me late for work and my then-boss was uber pissed off but hey the recruiter told me it was going to come at me fast and I needed to run with it. Since this job is what I worked my butt off for I couldn't pass up my chance to get on board. The rest is history!

Overheard at a gas station while stopping in for a pit stop and a drink:

Two black guys in du-rags and baggy clothing. The standard banger attire. Then a van comes into the parking lot with two Middle Eastern men in robes and long beards. One of the black guys says "awww hell dawg! Them mutha f••••• about to blow us up!"

That is funny!

The best explanation yet! A 19 year old is caught in a car with his 17 year old girlfriend. Not statutory rape but public lewdness had one wanted to push the issue. His pants and undies were off. When asked if he could have found a better place to have sex he said he was a Muslim and didn't engage in such behavior. The reason he was naked waist down was that it was hot and he needed to cool off. Brilliant! If I'm ever busted in a car with a woman that's exactly what I'm going to say!


I get called to a domestic violence scene with my camera. A pissed off father took a belt and beat the hell out of his daughter. Now, I'm all for beating the hell out of kids when they deserve it. However belt marks on both legs. Naaa! That's too much. I take the pictures of the injuries and then we go arrest the father. He wants to protest but I don't give him the chance. His son stands up and I thought he was going to try to interfere. At this stage I'm zero tolerance and told him once to sit his ass down. While we're finishing up the man's mother shows up all upset. Now had I known that he had a pending case for beating his wife before his daughter I'd have shattered mommy's bubble view of her son. I've got his family saying he's trying to raise a wicked daughter and she is the cause of all the trouble. I've got neighbors saying the father in a sociopath, smooth talker who beats women and his family seems to accept it. I don't know any of these people however my gut is inclined to believe that although the girl is no angel her father is worse.

On my way into the station I see someone running radar up ahead. That has to be Mrs. H! She's a sweetheart! I hit the accelerator to get my car up to 60 to have a little fun with her. As I get closer I realize it's not Mrs. H. Oh sh**! It's an officer from another agency and she's waving me over! Oh boy am I going to look stupid when I explain this to her. "Well officer I thought you were someone else!" I can see the letter already; "dear chief I thought it was someone else or I would have obeyed the traffic laws!" Thankfully as I slowed down to pull over she saw my uniform and waved me off! God bless her!


A drunk ex-employee stormed into a fast food restaurant and began tossing things around. As officers were en route he ran into the street banging on cars as they passed. Finally an officer found him and arrested him.


A robber hit a store ran by a man and his son. The robber shot the son and fought with the father who managed to take the gun from the robber and shot him in the head. Killed him instantly. Good job clerk!


A drunk and delusional woman goes to a department store with her 4-year old daughter and starts raising hell. She harasses customers for money and when she's told to leave she starts yelling and cursing and making a spectacle of herself. The officers get there and one recognizes her from past experience. Instead of taking her to jail he decides to take her to a psych hospital and the girl to CPS. Turns out she had two other small kids waiting at home. Those kids already have a major strike against them.


A man comes home drunk and starts yelling at his wife. He hits her and knocks her down. As they are fighting their elderly neighbor hears it and instead of calling the police. He shouts over his fence for them to shut up! Remind me not to have this fool for my neighbor. The bloodied woman refused to press charges however thanks to state law doesn't matter. He went to jail anyway.

A commander at another agency ordered an officer in his command to take his deptartment issued car to get it inspected. The officer wrecked his commander's car on the way to the inspection station. I'm still laughing!