I saw a woman sitting by herself in a funeral home parking lot around midnight. Okay kinda erie. I pull into the lot to check on her and she stumbles up and complains about her loser, convict boyfriend in heavily slurred speech. I felt a little sorry for her so I tried calling someone to come get her. Even though she was getting sarcastic and condescending. If you're drunk and the nice police officer tells you that you should clear your head and realize the officer controls your destiny you should tone the attitude. Long story short I try to find someone to get her but I got hung up on. So sad I arrest her for public intoxication.
Then I leave there and a possible kidnapping call goes out. I'm the closest unit so I hurry up. As I arrive I see the suspect vehicle getting on the freeway. I rush and catch up to the car. After a classic felony stop we learn it's two drunks fighting about who is more sober to drive. He is also found with a prohibited weapon and hydrocodone so he gets arrested and she goes to the drunk tank for the night.
It's quiet for the next few hours. I'm eating dinner and tolerating the manager's/cook's teasing then she tells me about a guy who walked out on his tab last week. I mail him a citation for theft of service.
It's the end of the night and I'm on my way home when I find a guy passed out in a car. I stop in my personal car and ask for a unit to check by. It's shift change so I hear crickets. Finally someone answers up and arrives. The drunk tells me he is an airborne ranger about to go back over seas. Despite my immense respect for military personnel I'm not satisfied he gave me his correct name. I run him and nothing matches. I say "f*** it" and arrest him for public intoxication. Sure enough I find his license and sure enough he gave me a fake name. I'm guessing he lied about being active military.