"Get your butt home!"

A woman called us to her house. The call said her husband was having an affair and she only wanted a male officer to come to her house. My initial thought was she trying to get pay back and this was the wrong way to do it. At least wait until the officer is off duty! Just kidding! Anyhow, we get there and she tells us that her husband is spending too much time at the gym where there are too many younger, hot women. She wanted us to call him and tell him to get home. I had to stand there, oh so many quips were forming just itching to be said. I can only imagine the man working out at the gym, probably checking out the women there. When his cell phone rings;

"Hello."

"Sir this is officer George! Your wife is pissed and wants you to bring your butt home now!"

Another officer beat me to the quip. He suggested she go to the gym with him and check out all the young guys. Of course he didn't mention probably half of them are gay. We then left the house.