I was catching up on paperwork when I got asked to tag along for a felony warrant service. Not being able to resist a good time I said sure. A group of young men were burglarizing houses for another person and then bring the stolen goods to his house where they were stored. He had been running around bragging to his friends that the "cops are too f****** stupid" to catch him. His house was the first one we hit. We get him no problem. Of course he uses "I ain't did nothing" line. Yet he didn't say it with any passion. He said in a tone that suggests it was expected of him to say it to continue the game. Keep in mind had the police just come in my house and said they had a felony warrant I'd act out the "aggravated" portion of the statute! As I'm walking out to the car I tell him his little burglar ring is over. I then add "by the way who is too stupid to catch you?" He looks at me and replies with an insincere "what are you talking about!" I tell him we hear he's been saying we're too stupid to get him. He laughs as he denies it! We then go to the next house and park right behind it. As we walk around to the front door we hear the front door shut. We start knocking and nothing, nada, zilch! Someone is hunkered down in there trying to wait us out. We debate kicking in the door and just going in (felony warrant) versus trying out other options. As we're pursuing an option a man calls into our dispatch wanting to know why the cops are at his house. He claims his neighbor called. Problem is that I talked to his neighbor and she didn't call! The only one who could have called was inside that house! He further tells dispatch that nobody is in his house! This gives us an angle to use. I call him and he repeats his story. I then tell him what I know and that I want son #2 for a felony warrant. I tell him not to lie to me because I know his neighbor didn't call. I tell him either there is a burglar in his house or it's his son and asked him to treat me like I treat him. It worked, sort of. He tells me son #5 is in the house. I reassure him I don't want son #5 and if it is just him all he has to do is talk to us and we'll leave him alone. After some more reassurances son #5 answers the door and says his older brother is inside. We weren't expecting son #4 (at first I thought he was our subject). After we clear the house we start chewing into the two boys who are telling one lie after another. Even when confronted with their lives son #5 doesn't skip a beat when changing his story to cover up his exposed lie. I imagine the whole family lies to each other so much it's pathetic. Unfortunately for son #4 he has traffic warrants which he claims his fugitive brother used his name and the warrants aren't his. Well, technically they are and really I didn't give a damn! He hid in his house for an hour and wants to play games with us so we'll humor him and put him in jail for "his" warrants and let him clear that up on his own!


The rest of the night was mostly uneventful. Until I spotted some fool driving on the wrong side of the road with cars swerving to avoid him. I pull him over and in a thick accent says "my bad!" He isn't drunk, he says he is not familiar with the area as he is from the southside. I guess they don't drive on the right side of the road on the southside. He has an assault warrant for his arrest so he takes a trip anyway.