A lot of calls today, but most are juvenile party calls. I hate those, always have. When I worked night shift on Saturday nights one could expect a party call or two. Those in far west district got them for the first half of the night. I have a low patience meter with teenagers anyway, however I aim not to be that "d***head cop" that everyone knows and hates by reputation. Basically, I use the golden rule, if you're cool with me, I'm cool with you. You act stupid then I'm gonna layeth the smack down.
One time, I got called to a teenage party. Now, when I arrived I didn't see any alcohol, but I knew it was there. So I called the kid who lived there and made a deal. They stay inside and stay quiet we wouldn't have any problems. He was happy with this agreement. As we were talking I hear someone run up to the fence and climb it. Some fool leaps over the fence and lands right next to me. I told him "hey spiderman, no need to run!" He laughed and we were cool. I had no problems the rest of the night. The very next night, same call, same house. Okay, now I'm annoyed. I felt they were taking advantage of the break I gave them the previous night. Well, as I arrive my buddy is in the front yard with spiderman shouting at him. Spiderman is shouting back. I can tell he's drunk and I know he isn't 21. With everyone watching I decide to make an example of him. I tell him to come to me, he backs into the house. I grab his arm and he punches me in the chin. Oh hell no! Now it's on like chitlins! I run after him and we to fighting. Now, keep in mind, this isn't his house. While we're fighting we're tearing up furniture, lamps, and other things. My buddy is behind me. Spiderman grabs my neck and before I can even think to get him off me my buddy whacks him with the baton so hard it goes flying from his hand. My buddy wound up spraining his hand. I manage to get a lock on spiderman as we fall onto a window sill where I make him submit. As I'm cuffing him, one of his moron friends tries to interfere. We get spiderman cuffed and we walk him to the car. I'm pretty pissed off by now and I'm shouting at him. I failed to see the flowerbed in front of me and tripped and fell flat on my face in front of everyone. Now, I'm really, really pissed off (and embarrassed). He goes in the car and his moron friend comes up. He gets cuffed and stuffed too. While I'm working on the jail forms, moron friend's mother walks up to me (someone called her) and tries to open the door to get her kid out of the car. I stop her and explain she can't do that. She doesn't believe me. I tell her to get off my scene, she refuses, mommy gets arrested, and the bi*** wants to fight too. Another wants to spray her, but I stopped him. I didn't feel right using pepper spray on a 50 year old woman if even she was an idiot. So I used a gentle wrist lock and gently guided her into the car. So, all three went to jail.
Another party call. I walk up and as others are running every which way some teen girl walks up with a beer and cigarette in her hand. I ask how old she was, she was 17. Talk about stupid. I demand to speak with the resident. Turns out, she bailed with half of the party (from what the teens who stayed behind told me). Oh, so we have a bunch of people in a house and we have no resident. So, with that as my justification, I walk in and find people hiding. I checked one closet and it was locked. Now, who the hell locks a closet? I peek under the door and see jeans kneeling. Someone is hiding in there. I use my pocket knife to walk the lock and find two teenagers hiding. I handcuffed both of them and marched them outside. I find a bedroom door locked. After bluffing my way in, the two girls and one guy get handcuffed and marched outside. I make all the handcuffed people sit down, in front of those who didn't run. I issue citations to the underage people. The resident finally comes back, she plays ignorant. I consider arresting her for evading arrest (when word spread that the cops were here they ran), but decided it wouldn't stick. All she has to say is she wasn't there to start with and I couldn't prove otherwise.
Anyway, I hate party calls. Always have, always will.
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